Print Friendly, PDF & Email

Hi Gramps,

My husband lost his job but has good prospects for getting another one. We have savings and a very large house and lots of acreage. We have a few other assets. My husband is pressuring me to get a job. He is even considering taking a lower paying job in order to “encourage” me to work. We have one child left at home. He is 14; grade 9. When I told my husband that the prophet has counseled women to stay home if at all possible, he told me that it is different when they are our boy’s age. I don’t think so! He’s a great kid and I don’t want to risk putting him in a situation where he comes home alone and is unsupervised. I love picking him up after school and being there for him. My husband does not value the contributions I make as a homemaker as he feels they are not enough. I do have time for other things when my boy is in school and I spend that time doing volunteer work for hospice patients, Boy Scouts, etc. I pick up my son after school so he doesn’t have to take the long nasty bus ride home. I love that time with him. My husband doesn’t think it is important. He is pressuring me more and more to find a job. I would rather sell our too large house, not have tv, and cut many more things before I go to work. He is becoming adamant that I work outside the home. I do have a master’s degree in social work and could find a job easily. However he is pressuring me to leave the social work field and find employment that pays more – perhaps in Human Services in a large high tech company. This seems like such an empty use of my time and I do not want to do it. What counsel can you give me? I will very willingly resume my career when my boy is on his mission but I don’t want to now.

Rose, from Rochester, Washington


Dear Rose,

My counsel to you is to announce to your husband that when your boy graduates from high school you will consider working outside the home, but not until then. End of story. Amen. No discussion!!

If he takes a job with lower pay to encourage you to work outside the home, tell him to see Rule No. 1, and that you’ll do your best to get along on the lower salary while you continue to secure your son’s welfare.


(Visited 12 times, 1 visits today)
Copyright © 2018 Ask Gramps - Q and A about Mormon Doctrine. All Rights Reserved.
This website is not owned by or affiliated with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (sometimes called the Mormon or LDS Church). The views expressed herein do not necessarily represent the position of the Church. The views expressed by individual users are the responsibility of those users and do not necessarily represent the position of the Church. For the official Church websites, please visit or

Pin It on Pinterest