Question
Gramps,
For a few years now, I’ve had a problem with cutting myself. Sometimes to have some control over my feelings, sometimes to ‘punish’ myself for making a mistake. I haven’t been able to find any church advice on this topic anywhere. I would love to hear your thoughts on this subject and where the Church stands.
Alicia
Answer
Alicia,
Self-harm, often referred to as self-injury, is a behavior where individuals intentionally inflict harm on themselves as a way to cope with emotional distress. The reasons behind self-harm are varied and can include feelings of sadness, anxiety, or a sense of being overwhelmed. For many, it serves as a temporary relief from emotional pain, but it can also lead to a cycle of guilt and shame, particularly within religious contexts where individuals may feel they are falling short of spiritual expectations.
Self-harm is often a maladaptive coping mechanism. Just as some people might turn to food, alcohol, or other substances to cope with stress, self-harm can be a way to express emotional pain or regain a sense of control. It is crucial to recognize that self-harm is not merely a cry for help; it is often a deeply ingrained response to trauma or mental health issues such as depression, anxiety, or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints may feel an added layer of complexity regarding their worthiness to participate in sacred ordinances, such as entering the temple. The Church teaches that individuals are not defined by their struggles but by their efforts to overcome them. This perspective is essential for understanding how self-harm fits into the broader narrative of worthiness and repentance.
Mental health plays a significant role in the discussion of self-harm and worthiness. Many individuals who self-harm may be dealing with underlying mental health conditions that require professional intervention. The Church encourages its members to seek help from mental health professionals, recognizing that mental illness is a legitimate health concern that can affect anyone, regardless of their faith or spiritual standing.
Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, has spoken extensively about mental health issues within the Church. In his talk “Like a Broken Vessel,” he emphasizes that individuals struggling with mental health challenges are not alone and that healing is possible. He reassures members that the Lord understands their pain and is there to support them through their struggles.
The question of worthiness to enter the temple is a significant concern for many Latter-day Saints. The temple is considered a sacred space where members can make covenants with God and receive spiritual guidance. However, the criteria for worthiness can sometimes feel daunting, especially for those who have engaged in self-harm.
In the context of self-harm, it is essential to differentiate between actions that require repentance and those that do not. Self-harm, while unhealthy, is not necessarily a sin in the eyes of the Church. It is often a manifestation of deeper emotional struggles rather than a deliberate choice to disobey God. Therefore, individuals who have self-harmed may not need to confess this behavior to their bishop unless it is accompanied by other actions that violate Church teachings.
For many, the process of repentance involves acknowledging one’s struggles and seeking help. This can include talking to a bishop, but it is not always necessary for every individual. The Church encourages members to focus on healing and growth rather than dwelling on past mistakes. The emphasis is on moving forward and finding healthier coping mechanisms, such as prayer, meditation, or therapy.
For those who are uncertain about their worthiness, seeking guidance from a bishop can be a helpful step. Bishops are trained to provide spiritual counsel and support, and they can help individuals navigate their feelings of guilt or shame. In many cases, bishops may ask if the individual is receiving professional help for their mental health struggles, which can be a crucial factor in determining worthiness.
It is important to remember that bishops are not there to judge but to help members find peace and healing. Many individuals have found that discussing their struggles with a bishop can lead to a sense of relief and clarity, allowing them to focus on their spiritual journey without the burden of past mistakes weighing them down.
The journey toward healing from self-harm is not linear, and it often requires a multifaceted approach. For members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, this journey can be supported through faith, community, and professional help.
Finding healthy coping mechanisms is essential for individuals who have engaged in self-harm. The Church encourages practices such as prayer, scripture study, and attending church services as ways to foster spiritual growth and emotional well-being. Additionally, engaging in physical activities, creative outlets, and building supportive relationships can provide alternative ways to cope with stress and emotional pain.
Community support plays a vital role in the healing process. The Church offers various programs and resources aimed at helping members navigate their struggles. Support groups, counseling services, and youth programs can provide a sense of belonging and understanding for those dealing with self-harm and mental health issues. Connecting with others who have faced similar challenges can foster a sense of hope and resilience.
Ultimately, healing from self-harm is a personal journey that requires patience and self-compassion. Individuals need to recognize that they are not defined by their past actions but by their commitment to growth and healing. The Church teaches that everyone is a child of God, deserving of love and support, regardless of their struggles.
As Elder Holland stated, “Broken minds can be healed just the way broken bones and broken hearts are healed.” This message of hope is a reminder that healing is possible, and individuals can find their way back to a place of peace and worthiness.
Gramps
