Gramps,

If an unmarried couple has a baby, was that baby less valiant in the premortal world?

Gael

Answer

Gael,

The doctrine of pre-mortal life is rooted in the belief that all human beings existed as spirits before their earthly birth. According to the scriptures, particularly in the Book of Abraham, we learn that we were organized as intelligences and that some were chosen to be leaders based on their worthiness and valiance in the pre-mortal realm. Abraham 3:22-23 states, “Now the Lord had shown unto me, Abraham, the intelligences that were organized before the world was; and among all these there were many of the noble and great ones; and God saw these souls that they were good.

This scripture suggests that our pre-mortal actions and choices significantly influence our mortal lives. The idea that we were “noble and great” implies that we had the potential to fulfill divine purposes on Earth. However, the question arises: did we have to do something specific to qualify for being born into a covenant family?

Being “born in the covenant” refers to individuals born to parents who have been sealed in the temple, thus establishing a family unit that is recognized in the eyes of God. This status is often viewed as a blessing, providing a spiritual advantage in the journey of mortality. However, the teachings of the Church suggest that the circumstances of our birth—whether in the covenant or not—do not necessarily reflect our pre-mortal worthiness or valiance.

President Ezra Taft Benson emphasized that our generation is marked by significant expectations from God, stating, “God has held you in reserve to make your appearance in the final days before the second coming of the Lord” (The Teachings of Ezra Taft Benson*. Salt Lake City, UT: Bookcraft 1988). This perspective suggests that regardless of our birth circumstances, we have a divine purpose and potential to fulfill in this life.

One of the most critical aspects of Latter-day Saint theology is the concept of agency—the ability to choose. In the pre-mortal existence, spirits were allowed to choose to follow God’s plan. Doctrine and Covenants 138:55-56 states, “I observed that they were also among the noble and great ones who were chosen in the beginning to be rulers in the Church of God.” This indicates that our choices in the pre-mortal life were instrumental in determining our roles and responsibilities in mortality.

However, it is essential to recognize that the trials and tribulations we face in this life are not necessarily punishments for our pre-mortal choices. For instance, individuals born into challenging circumstances, such as poverty or abuse, should not be judged as “less valiant” in the pre-mortal realm. The complexities of life are often a result of the agency of others and the inherent challenges of mortality.

The question of whether we chose our families in the pre-mortal life is a topic of much speculation. While there is no explicit scriptural reference confirming that we made specific pacts with family members, many members of The Church believe that relationships formed in the pre-mortal existence carry over into mortality. In an earlier response to a question about family arrangements,  I noted that while there is no definitive scriptural evidence, the continuation of loving relationships from the pre-mortal world is a reasonable assumption.

This belief can provide comfort to those who experience familial challenges. It suggests that the relationships we have in this life may be part of a larger divine plan, even if we do not fully understand it. The idea that we may have chosen to come to Earth in specific family circumstances can help individuals find meaning in their struggles and foster a sense of purpose.

While the specifics of our pre-mortal choices remain largely unknown, it is clear that they have a significant impact on our mortal experiences. The teachings of the Church emphasize that our current circumstances are a result of our past actions, but they also stress the importance of focusing on our present choices and how we can serve God and others.

In the face of life’s challenges, it is crucial to remember that our worth is not determined by our birth circumstances. I want to reassure individuals struggling with feelings of inadequacy or suffering that their trials are not punishments for past actions. Instead, they are opportunities for growth and service. The focus should be on how we can be valiant in our current lives, regardless of our past.

For example, individuals who face significant hardships, such as those with disabilities or those who have experienced abuse, can still find ways to serve and uplift others. The story of Mother Teresa serves as a powerful reminder that one’s circumstances do not define their ability to make a difference in the world. Her life of service to the poor and needy exemplifies the idea that we can fulfill our divine purpose regardless of our starting point in life.

Ultimately, the journey of life is about learning, growing, and serving. While our pre-mortal existence may have laid the groundwork for our mortal experiences, it is our choices in this life that truly define us. The teachings of the Church encourage individuals to focus on their current actions and how they can contribute to the Lord’s work.

Related articles:

Is there revelation concerning family arrangements made in pre-mortality?

Did I do something terrible in the premortal world?

Gramps

Gramps,

In the Old Testament, circumcision was how baby boys were brought into the covenant relationship with God (see Genesis 17:9-12). The ordinance of baptism is also how we are brought into the covenant relationship with God. Why was it okay to bring babies into the covenant relationship through circumcision in the Old Testament, but not okay to bring babies into the covenant through baptism?

Brad

Answer

Brad,

Circumcision, as instituted in the Old Testament, serves as a physical sign of the covenant between God and His people. This ritual was not limited by geography, ethnicity, or age, indicating a universal invitation for inclusion. The practice dates back to the time of Abraham, highlighting its foundational significance in establishing a relationship with the divine.

Genesis 17:10-12 (Joseph Smith Translation) emphasizes the enduring nature of this covenant: “This is My covenant, which ye shall keep, between Me and you and thy seed after thee; and ye shall be their God, and they shall be your people.” The removal of the foreskin on the eighth day was a mark of belonging and commitment, symbolizing purity and dedication to God’s commandments. Importantly, circumcision was extended to all male infants, signifying that entry into the covenant community did not hinge on personal culpability but on communal belonging and divine grace.

Contrasting with the Old Testament practice, infant baptism emerged as a prevalent ritual in various Christian denominations. However, its legitimacy has been a subject of theological dispute, particularly within The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Critics argue that infant baptism deviates from early Christian teachings and scriptural mandates, suggesting that it was not an original practice endorsed by the apostles or early church fathers.

The Joseph Smith Translation (JST) of Genesis 17:6 provides a critical perspective: “certain heretics had turned from the commandments, and taken unto themselves the washing of children.” This assertion indicates that the practice of infant baptism was seen as a distortion of true doctrine, introducing a ritual that was not aligned with the intended principles of baptism and covenantal inclusion. Furthermore, the Church’s teachings emphasize that children are not accountable before God until they reach the age of eight, aligning with practices such as circumcision, which underscores personal accountability and the capacity to enter into covenants.

At the heart of the debate lies the understanding of redemption, atonement, and individual accountability. Circumcision in the Old Testament was a visible sign of God’s promise and protection, not directly linked to the concept of original sin or the need for redemption. Conversely, baptism in the New Testament is intrinsically connected to the atonement of Jesus Christ, symbolizing purification and the remission of sins.

The JST clarifies that the doctrine of redemption was misconstrued when linking baptism to the blood of Abel, a reference not supported elsewhere in scripture. This misinterpretation suggests that the practice of infant baptism conflates redemption with a hereditary state of sinfulness, which was not the original intention. Instead, the Church teaches that baptism should be a conscious act of faith, reflecting an individual’s understanding and willingness to accept the covenant with God.

Moreover, the notion that children are born in sin, as interpreted by some through infant baptism, is explicitly refuted in the Church’s doctrine. According to Doctrine and Covenants 74:6-7, children are considered holy and are sanctified through the atonement of Jesus Christ, eliminating the need for baptism as a rite of purification from sin. This theological stance emphasizes the innate innocence of children and their inherent capacity to enter into covenants without the necessity of infant baptism.

The Apostolic Fathers and the Ante-Nicene Fathers provide historical insights into early Christian practices and beliefs. These early church leaders largely advocated for the believer’s baptism, where individuals consciously decide to undergo baptism upon reaching an age of accountability and personal conviction. This practice aligns with the Church’s emphasis on the agency and informed consent of the individual.

The absence of infant baptism in the teachings and practices of the Apostolic Fathers underscores its later development as a theological construct rather than an apostolic mandate. This historical perspective reinforces the argument that infant baptism was a deviation from early Christian traditions, introduced by certain heretical groups who misinterpreted scriptural covenants and doctrines.

Central to the Church’s rejection of infant baptism is the principle of agency—the God-given right and responsibility to make personal choices. Baptism, therefore, is viewed as an act that should be undertaken by individuals who can consciously commit to the covenant, reflecting their understanding and acceptance of its obligations and blessings.

Circumcision, on the other hand, was a communal and physical sign of the covenant, not predicated on personal choice or moral accountability. It served as a perpetual reminder of the ancestral covenant and God’s everlasting promises, thereby not necessitating the individual’s awareness or consent at the time of the ritual.

The differentiation between these two practices highlights a broader theological emphasis on personal agency and accountability in covenant relationships. While circumcision was a communal identifier, baptism represents a personal commitment to follow Christ, necessitating individual understanding and consent.

Gramps

Gramps,

Looking at LDS baby blessings. Besides it being an ordinance and recorded in the church, what’s the point of blessing him? Does he need a blessing to receive blessings? He won’t remember the blessing anyway, so what’s the point of giving one?

Taylor

Answer

Taylor,

Baby blessings in the Church fulfill two primary purposes: imparting a divine blessing upon the child and officially recording the child’s name within Church records.

At the heart of the baby blessing is the desire to bestow a blessing upon the child through the authority of the Holy Priesthood. This blessing is believed to be recorded in heaven, exerting a positive influence on the child’s life. The laying on of hands by priesthood holders is a vital aspect of this ordinance, symbolizing the transfer of divine blessings and protection.

The Church teaches that such blessings can guide and influence the child’s spiritual journey, providing a spiritual legacy that parents and the community uphold. This practice aligns with the Church’s emphasis on the eternal nature of family and the importance of spiritual continuity across generations.

The second purpose of a baby blessing is to officially enter the child’s name into the Church records. When a child is blessed, they are designated as “A Child of Record,” ensuring their inclusion in Church statistics and records. This administrative aspect is crucial for several reasons:

1. Primary Rolls and Class Assignments: The names of blessed infants are used to create Primary rolls, which are essential for organizing children into their respective classes within the Primary organization. This facilitates structured spiritual education and community engagement from an early age.

2. Membership and Participation: Being recorded as a member of the Church from infancy acknowledges the child’s place within the faith community. This recognition fosters a sense of belonging and identity as the child grows and participates in various Church activities and ordinances.

While both baby blessings and baptism serve to incorporate individuals into the Church, they operate at different stages of a person’s life and carry distinct theological implications.

Baptism in the Church is a covenant between the individual and God, symbolizing repentance, the desire to follow Jesus Christ, and the commitment to live according to Church teachings. It is typically performed at the age of accountability (eight years old) when children are deemed capable of understanding and consenting to the covenants they are making.

This ordinance is a public testimony of faith and an essential step towards spiritual growth and salvation within the framework of Church doctrine.

In contrast, baby blessings are performed for infants who are not yet of an age to comprehend or make covenants. Instead, these blessings seek to set a spiritual foundation for the child’s life and formally recognize them within the Church community. The blessing serves as both a spiritual initiation and an administrative record, distinct from the personal commitment and covenant that baptism represents.

In the Church, the authority to perform blessings comes from the priesthood, which is considered the power and authority of God delegated to man. This priesthood authority is essential for the legitimacy and efficacy of the blessings bestowed upon individuals, including infants.

Priesthood holders, typically fathers or male guardians, perform the blessing through the laying on of hands, invoking divine favor and protection for the child. This act is believed to align the child’s life with God’s purposes and provide divine guidance throughout their development.

The concept of a spiritual inheritance is pivotal in understanding baby blessings. The Church teaches that blessings received early in life have lasting effects, shaping the child’s spiritual journey and potential. Parents and priesthood holders believe that these blessings are part of a divine plan, offering protection, guidance, and a foundation for future spiritual growth.

Some may view baby blessings as a tradition rather than an ordinance, but within the Church, they hold significant doctrinal and spiritual importance. As ordained by the Church’s priesthood authority, baby blessings are considered essential rites that bless and protect children from an early age.

Keep in mind. The child may not remember the blessing, but the parents will.

Gramps

Gramps,

When a baby dies in utero, does this unborn baby get another chance to be born or will the parents be able to raise the child in the hereafter?

Gwen

Answer

Gwen,

The question of what happens to unborn babies and whether they have another chance to be born or if parents can raise them in the hereafter is a deeply emotional and sensitive topic. Within the teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, there is a profound sense of hope and comfort surrounding this issue. 

One of the foundational beliefs in Latter-day Saint doctrine is the eternal nature of the spirit. According to the teachings of the Church, every human being has a pre-mortal existence as a spirit. This belief underscores the idea that every child, regardless of their earthly experience, has a spirit that existed before birth. In the words of Elder Bruce R. McConkie, “The body of man enters upon its career as a tiny germ or embryo, which becomes an infant, quickened at a certain stage by the spirit whose tabernacle it is” (McConkie, B. R. (1984). *Mormon Doctrine*. Salt Lake City, UT: Bookcraft.)

The understanding that spirits exist before birth provides solace to parents who may have lost a child through stillbirth, miscarriage, or abortion. These children are believed to be children of God, and their spirits continue to exist in a realm beyond this earthly life. This belief affirms that even though a child may not have had the opportunity to experience life on earth, they still possess an eternal essence.

A central tenet of Latter-day Saint theology is the belief in resurrection. The Church teaches that all children who die before reaching the age of accountability, which is considered to be eight years old, are saved in the celestial kingdom of heaven. This includes those who are stillborn or miscarried. President Joseph F. Smith articulated this comforting doctrine, stating that these children would be resurrected as children and that parents would have the joy of nurturing them in the afterlife. (Taken from the Liahona, article by Mark A. Matthews)

The belief in resurrection offers hope that these precious spirits will not be lost but will instead be restored to their perfect state. The doctrine emphasizes that the resurrection is made possible through the Atonement of Jesus Christ, which encompasses all individuals, including innocent children. As stated in the Book of Mormon, “the blood of Christ atoneth for little children.” (Mosiah 3:16) This assurance provides immense comfort to grieving parents, reinforcing the idea that they will one day be reunited with their beloved children.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints provides valuable guidance for parents who experience the loss of a child. The General Handbook states that “the loss of a child before birth is an event requiring emotional and spiritual support for grieving parents” (Section 38.7.3). This acknowledgment of the profound grief that accompanies such a loss is essential for providing comfort and healing.

While temple ordinances are not performed for stillborn children, the Church emphasizes that this does not imply any loss of eternal blessings or family unity. Parents are encouraged to hold memorial services or record the names of their stillborn children in family records, allowing them to honor their memories and acknowledge their eternal existence.

Moreover, Church leaders have expressed hope and assurance that all children who die before the age of accountability are saved and will be able to live with their families in the hereafter. This belief is echoed in personal testimonies shared by members of the Church, such as Melinda E. Jennings, who recounted her experience with stillbirth and the peace she found in trusting the Lord’s plan for her child.

The teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints provide a hopeful perspective regarding the fate of unborn babies. The doctrine emphasizes that every child, regardless of their earthly experience, is cherished and has a place in the eternal plan of salvation. For grieving parents, these beliefs serve as a beacon of hope during dark times.

The emotional and spiritual support offered by the Church extends not only to parents but also to families as a whole. The understanding that these children will be resurrected and reunited with their families fosters a sense of connection and continuity, reinforcing the belief that family bonds transcend mortality.

In conclusion, the teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints affirm the eternal nature of spirits, the hope of resurrection, and the comfort provided to families grieving the loss of an unborn child. While specific details about the timing and circumstances of resurrection may not be fully revealed, the overarching message is one of love, hope, and the promise of eternal families. This doctrine offers solace to those who have faced the heartbreaking loss of an unborn child, affirming the belief that these precious spirits will indeed have a place in the eternal plan of salvation.

Gramps

Gramps,

What and where is the scriptural basis for your contention that a person’s spirit existed in Heaven before that person’s earthly body was born? Does that spirit inhabit a baby’s body before birth or, as you see it, or does it occur when the baby emerges from the birth canal? If the spirit is not present in preborn babies, they are just blobs of human flesh that have no eternal significance. Abortion then is not a bad thing at all. The many millions of babies who were never allowed to draw their first breath are of no consequence to God. What happens to all those uncounted spirits who pre-existed in Heaven, waiting to inhabit their human counterparts?

Anonymous

Answer

Aonymous,

On first blush, your main thrust of questions deals merely with why the value of life should be placed so high. After all, if the life inside a mother’s womb doesn’t count somehow, then it doesn’t matter. Whereas if it does count, how do we know? How can we prove it?

First of all I want you to reflect on the Law of Moses. Understand that the LORD would have rather given Israel a much higher law, but they weren’t prepared for it, so instead they were given a by-the-numbers law instead. The Law of Moses was intended to guide Israel to be prepared for the higher law to be given later on. Part of the Law of Moses is the well-known punishments for adultery as well as murder. The consequence of either was death. So it would appear that the LORD viewed life as very important, both how we come into this life, and how we leave it.

Part of the reason we value life so much is because we are, in a small way, sharing in the further creative process begun from before the foundations of the Earth. God guards his powers carefully and abusing the creative powers each of us has within us is a very serious matter in his eyes.

One of our main purposes in this life is to first of all, get here and obtain a physical body. Through the Atonement of Christ we are assured that while death may separate us from our bodies, it is but a temporary thing. We will receive our bodies, perfect and immortal because Jesus was ‘the firstfruits of them that slept.’

Now to your questions directly,

(Q) What and where is the scriptural basis for your contention that a person’s spirit existed in Heaven before that person’s earthly body was born?

(A) One of the scriptures that explains pre-mortal existence is found in Jeremiah 1:5,

Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations.

(Q) Does that spirit inhabit a baby’s body before birth or, as you see it, or does it occur when the baby emerges from the birth canal?

(A) Nobody knows the precise moment the spirit actually inhabits the body, but many Latter-day Saints believe it begins at conception. However this question is entirely beside the point. Once a pregnancy is commenced, the most common outcome is childbirth. Any mature adult should understand this all but instinctively. Then remembering that each adult was once a helpless fetus should invoke a spirit of humility and protective love on the part of the parents, but such isn’t always the case.

(Q) If the spirit is not present in pre-born babies, they are just blobs of human flesh that have no eternal significance. Abortion then is not a bad thing at all. The many millions of babies who were never allowed to draw their first breath are of no consequence to God.

(A) This causes me to see only the cold-hearted selfishness that is unfortunately more and more common among my fellow man. Can you think of any universal condition God has placed upon us that has no eternal significance? If you can, you do not know the smallest part of the mind of God, which is unfortunate because he has revealed far more to us than that. Statements like this make me sorrow for the future generations of adults that care nothing for their posterity. Already it is present among us in parents killing their own children. I fail to imagine anything more horrifying, and yes, I put unnecessary abortions in that category.

(Q) What happens to all those uncounted spirits who pre-existed in Heaven, waiting to inhabit their human counterparts?

(A) God is a perfectly just being. All who have been obedient to Him in the spirit world, or premortal existence, will obtain the promised reward of a physical body. No plans of men or Satan can stop the will of God from being fulfilled.   Which death causes you to flinch first, a newborn kitten, or a human fetus? You should flinch at both equally, because they’re both equally innocent in the eyes of their creator.

I cannot emphasize how serious abortion is as a moral issue when viewed through the written word of God. It makes no difference whatsoever when the spirit enters the body. The entire purpose of our procreative abilities is to further the accomplishment of God’s will for us all. To view them in any other light is to entirely miss the point of why we were entrusted with them in the first place. It is true there are many aspects of life that are affected by our sexuality, but none of them hold a candle to the main purpose, to bring our fellow brothers and sisters into the stage of life essential for eternal progression.

There are cases where an abortion is medically advisable, and possibly even necessary to preserve life. Even in these cases the Church gives a solemn warning that even considering an abortion in such a case must be done prayerfully and with sufficient counsel from not only doctors but Bishops as well. The tone of your comments has touched a nerve of mine that disturbs me for several reasons. My marriage and my family have not always been easy to have. My children have not always been a source of joy to me. They have been sources of worry, sorrow, anger, fear, and anxiety that only parents know. Through it all I would have never given them up for anything. I am who I am because of the family I have helped raise with my wife. I have been tempered and tested on every emotional level I could think of because of raising my children. The blessings that have come to me from the life I have lived have yet to stop coming. I cannot imagine willingly giving up any of my children for any reason at all.

Perhaps the biggest lesson we need to learn is selflessness. This world has become so selfish that abortion has actually become a debatable issue. I thought we had worked harder to provide a better world for our children. I hope that in time they can still have it through selfless decisions rather than the selfish ones being considered now.

Gramps

Gramps,

I gave birth to twin babies 3 years ago. They were both born alive but lived for less than two hours before returning to their Heavenly Father. Please help me understand whether or not I need to do temple work for them.  Baptisms?  Endowments? I’ve asked others and have  received different answers. Please help.
Thank you,

Brooke

Answer

Dear Brooke,

I will never be able to understand the pain which comes from being a mother who loses her precious child, let alone two, after such a short time on earth or any length of time, for that matter. There are no words that could possibly help the human mind comprehend the grief and sadness but the Lord does understand and He is, and should be, the source of comfort.

The knowledge we have obtained from reading scriptures is that Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ love their children and not only that, more so their littlest ones.

Let’s review what The Lord, through his servants, has said about baptizing little children:

Moroni 8:10-21

10 Behold I say unto you that this thing shall ye teach—repentance and baptism unto those who are accountable and capable of committing sin; yea, teach parents that they must repent and be baptized, and humble themselves as their little children, and they shall all be saved with their little children.

 

11 And their little children need no repentance, neither baptism. Behold, baptism is unto repentance to the fulfilling the commandments unto the remission of sins.

 

12 But little children are alive in Christ, even from the foundation of the world; if not so, God is a partial God, and also a changeable God, and a respecter to persons; for how many little children have died without baptism!

 

13 Wherefore, if little children could not be saved without baptism, these must have gone to an endless hell.

 

14 Behold I say unto you, that he that supposeth that little children need baptism is in the gall of bitterness and in the bonds of iniquity; for he hath neither faith, hope, nor charity; wherefore, should he be cut off while in the thought, he must go down to hell.

 

15 For awful is the wickedness to suppose that God saveth one child because of baptism, and the other must perish because he hath no baptism.

 

16 Wo be unto them that shall pervert the ways of the Lord after this manner, for they shall perish except they repent. Behold, I speak with boldness, having authority from God; and I fear not what man can do; for perfect love casteth out all fear.

 

17 And I am filled with charity, which is everlasting love; wherefore, all children are alike unto me; wherefore, I love little children with a perfect love; and they are all alike and partakers of salvation.

 

18 For I know that God is not a partial God, neither a changeable being; but he is unchangeable from all eternity to all eternity.

 

19 Little children cannot repent; wherefore, it is awful wickedness to deny the pure mercies of God unto them, for they are all alive in him because of his mercy.

 

20 And he that saith that little children need baptism denieth the mercies of Christ, and setteth at naught the atonement of him and the power of his redemption.

 

21 Wo unto such, for they are in danger of death, hell, and an endless torment. I speak it boldly; God hath commanded me. Listen unto them and give heed, or they stand against you at the judgment-seat of Christ.

So, we this we should know that Heavenly Father has reserved his Kingdom for little children. The atonement covers all children whom have died before the age of accountability (which we know it to be 8 years old) and therefore need not be baptized.

Here is a quote which may help us get some comfort in knowing there is a plan for these children and it seems to be a great plan:

“Some worry because departed children have apparently lost the privilege of courtship, marriage, and other opportunities. But revelations concerning the spirit world assure us that normal relationships leading to eternal sealings are an ongoing part of that life. Elder Melvin J. Ballard observed:

 

“You mothers worry about your little children [who have died]. We do not perform sealings for them. I lost a son six years of age, and I saw him a man in the spirit world after his death, and I saw how he had exercised his own freedom of choice and would obtain of his own will and volition a companion, and in due time to him, and all those who are worthy of it, shall come all of the blessings and sealing privileges of the house of the Lord. Do not worry over it. They are safe; they are all right.

 

“Now, then, what is the status of your daughters who have died and have not been sealed to some man? … The sealing power shall be forever and ever with this Church, and provisions will be made for them. We cannot run faster than the Lord has provided the way. Their blessings and privileges will come to them in due time. In the meantime, they are safe.” (Bryant S. Hinckley, Sermons and Missionary Services of Melvin J. Ballard, Deseret Book Company, 1949, p. 260.)

So, to summarize the answer to your question: no! they need not be baptized nor confirmed, nor temple work of any kind needs to be done for them.

The only scenario where there might be some work needed is if you and your husband were not sealed prior to their birth. Then, they may be sealed to you and your husband at your bishop’s discretion and/or approval (he’d have to determine your temple worthiness and such for anyone entering the temple).

My thoughts are with you and know your Heavenly Father is very much aware and mindful of your little ones.

With Love,

Gramps

Gramps,

Will I ever get to have a baby? I am in my 60s. Do I ever get to have babies–descendants. I don’t mean adopting or spirit children. I mean getting big and pregnant and wearing really cool maternity clothes and looking really beautiful like pregnant women. I’ve heard that if you are worthy that no blessing will be withheld. I’m willing to adopt but I want to have physical children from my body. Things are supposed to happen in the Lords’ time–but it sounds like there’s no time for me.
Gail

Answer

Dear Gail,

Thank you for posting this question. I’m certain that you aren’t the only one whom has ever endured or wondered about this particular topic. I was going to share scripture and quotes that would ease this burden you’re enduring, but at the end of the day, it would be futile. I feel strongly that women, like yourself, are here to provide examples of true hope, remarkable spiritual strength and unshakable patience, specifically to those of us who lack what seems to be such elusive attributes. I wish I had the power of vision and could tell you, “Yes, you will have babies and lots of them”, but I don’t. The only BEING that can give you peace and knowledge of your future is Heavenly Father. Prayer is such a powerful tool that many seem to dismiss it due to its simplicity. But it is there and I’m not suggesting that you haven’t used it but I am encouraging you to continue using it. Also, our patriarchal blessings have key indicators which will give us specific instructions on how to direct our thoughts and actions to obtain such blessings. The timeline or duration of the completion of these blessings may not come during this lifetime but they will come.

Know this Gail:

God does know you, He does Love you and wants the best for you. Have faith! Have Hope! Keep the commandments and you WILL fulfill the measure of your creation.

With much love and respect,

Gramps

Allyson

___________

Allyson,

I am truly sorry to hear about your miscarriage, they are never easy for any woman with a desire to bear children. When we open our scriptures and read Doctrine and Covenants 45:58 it states, “And the earth shall be given unto them for an inheritance; and they shall multiply and wax strong, and their children shall grow up without sin unto salvation.”

From the Church’s Gospel Principles chapter 45  we also are able to read, “During the Millennium, mortals will still live on earth, and they will continue to have children as we do now (see D&C 45:58). Joseph Smith said that immortal beings will frequently visit the earth. These resurrected beings will help with the government and other work. (See Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, sel. Joseph Fielding Smith [1976], 268.)

People will still have their agency, and for a time many will be free to continue with their religions and ideas. Eventually everyone will confess that Jesus Christ is the Savior.”

Thus, the Church doctrine seems pretty clear Allyson that we will be able to multiply and replenish the earth during the Millennium.

Gramps

Kel

________________

Hi Kel –

The Church discourages surgical sterilization but makes an exception for health concerns. Church Handbook of Instructions, book 2, section 21.4.15, reads as follows:

Surgical Sterilization (Including Vasectomy)

The Church strongly discourages surgical sterilization as an elective form of birth control. Surgical sterilization should be considered only if (1) medical conditions seriously jeopardize life or health or (2) birth defects or serious trauma have rendered a person mentally incompetent and not responsible for his or her actions. Such conditions must be determined by competent medical judgment and in accordance with law. Even then, the persons responsible for this decision should consult with each other and with their bishop and should receive divine confirmation of their decision through prayer.

Sincerely,

Gramps

Gramps,

The LDS Church encourages married couples to have children. In a letter the Church says: “We have been commanded to multiply and replenish the earth that we may have joy and rejoicing in our posterity. “Where husband and wife enjoy health and vigor and are free from impurities that would be entailed upon their posterity, it is contrary to the teachings of the Church artificially to curtail or prevent the birth of children. We believe that those who practice birth control will reap disappointment by and by.” If this is all true, then what about the problems of population growth? Or the one child policy in China? How should we respond? As an ethical issue, knowing that increased population will mean a lack of food, pollution, increased war and crime, higher use of natural resources, and congestion in certain countries; should we be selfish and choose to have as many children as we want? And what about Mormons in China? How should they respond to the one child policy law?

Eliza

Answer

Eliza,

When understanding our moral obligation with regard to population growth we must understand first the doctrines associated with your question. Within your message there are two parts: first being resource and population control, second China and LDS members.

When we read the scriptures, particularly the Doctrine and Covenants 104: 17, this is specified:

For the earth is full, and there is enough and to spare; yea, I prepared all things, and have given unto the children of men to be agents unto themselves.

In this verse of scripture we see that the Lord is declaring that the earth is full and that there is enough to spare, and how he has prepared all things which have been given unto us. Thus the question we must ask ourselves, in relation to what others have stated, do we really need to worry about over-population issues? This does not mean that we become irresponsible citizens and trash everything. We are here to improve our situations, and to properly use resources which have been given.

With regard to having children, remember we are not able to help the Lord to bring  to pass the immortality and eternal life of his children without having more children. It isn’t selfish at all to bring children into this world.

As pertaining to China and members in China who are only able to have one child, then they are to obey the laws of the land as specified in our Articles of Faith #12.

12 We believe in being subject to kings, presidents, rulers, and magistrates, in obeying, honoring, and sustaining the law.

Members are to obey the laws of the land which they reside in.

Gramps

I would like to know why the church “strongly discourages” the use of donor eggs in in vitro fertilization. If I knew the reasoning I feel my husband and I could make a more informed decision, as the handbook states that it is the husband and wife’s decision. We would like to do the right thing. Do you know or can you speculate on the reasoning? Do you know how I can find out? Any information would be appreciated!

Leanne

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Dear Leanne,

Here is the Church’s policy you reference with regard to in vitro fertilization:

“The Church strongly discourages in vitro fertilization using semen from anyone but the husband or an egg from anyone but the wife. However, this is a personal matter that ultimately must be left to the judgment of the husband and wife. Responsibility for the decision rests solely upon them” (Church Handbook of Instruction 21.4.7).

I am not on familiar terms with anyone who contributed to the handbook, so I will not speculate as to the purpose behind this policy. Since you feel you need more spiritual guidance in finding a solution, I strongly urge you to visit with your bishop, who is your spiritual leader. You and your husband should counsel with him on this policy, then meet together again as a couple before the Lord and come to a consensus. Use your best judgment and seek the Lord’s confirmation.

-Gramps

Lee-Anne

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Lee-Anne,

If you do not do everything within your power to see that this baby is born healthy, you know that you will always feel guilty. If you miscarry because you failed to follow your doctors recommendations, you will feel responsible for its death. You will always wonder- “what if?”. Don’t put yourself through that kind of torture. Whether or not I or anyone else thinks it morally right matters little. You will always know that you failed to give it your best effort, and do you really want that on your conscience?

While this child may be unplanned and you feel unprepared, it is possible that the Lord has a most wonderful spirit in store to bless you and your family. Do what you can to help the baby along, and if you still miscarry even after all your best efforts, at least you will know that you did not give up.

Gramps