Question
Gramps,
The Church’s traditional culture (specifically in the US) has long been part of my family’s culture. I understand that customs aren’t doctrine and are subject to change. However, it’s still hard to listen to mission companions talk about how “it’s a good thing that we’re moving away from all that boring stuff,” and friends excitedly talking about how we can move on from the older hymns now. How can I better accept the cultural changes without feeling like we’re losing ourselves?
Erica
Answer
Dear Erica,
I have no way of knowing how you can best deal with these changes, but I have some ideas that might help, and perhaps through them, you will find what works best for you.
First, I must restate the obvious: Jesus Christ is the answer to every problem. The more intently you focus on Him and His doctrine, the less important other things and other people’s preferences will be. Through prayer, you can ask God to teach you and to soften your heart, so that you can view these changes through His eyes, or learn from Him how to rejoice in seeing the variety of ways that others enjoy the gospel. You can also express your love for our traditional culture and sorrow at the possibility of its loss. You can ask the Lord how to help others see beauty in the things you love, and to help you avoid letting these changes become a stumbling block for you or others.
Remember that losing ourselves is exactly what Christ has asked us to do.
Second, just because someone else doesn’t enjoy “If You Could Hie to Kolob” doesn’t mean you can’t continue to enjoy it to no end. Yes, as things change, your shared experience will change, but your personal and family experiences can focus wherever you choose to focus them.
Third, share your passion. Some have speculated that the new hymns, for example, are to help converts feel more “at home” through hymns they recognize. Perhaps you can befriend a convert and share with each other which hymns you enjoy, and why, so that both are edified. I have a friend who believes that changes in the presentation of the endowment are to help young members and converts, who grew up without symbolism as a common language, learn faster and better how and why to live their covenants – to discover sooner the deeper meanings to be found in the temple. If you have an understanding of those symbols, through your family culture, perhaps you can go to the temple with a friend and help them to see the beauty in the symbols there.
Can you speak passionately about how thrilling “all that boring stuff” actually is? If so, share your passion with your friends, and celebrate their passion for the new, even if you can’t feel excited about it yourself. At the end of the day, you have a choice: mourn alone, or celebrate together. Choose to celebrate together! Everything that brings anyone to Christ is a good thing. You don’t have to love the new hymns, but if a new hymn or a policy change or some other new thing is what it takes to bring even one soul to Jesus Christ, should we not welcome it and rejoice?
Fourth, have you ever wondered how Latter-day Saints in Peru, or Russia, or Vietnam, or Samoa, or Zambia perceive our hymns and traditions? What you are experiencing may help you to have compassion for others in similar situations. Spending time “in their shoes” – together with a prayer to ask the Lord to help you – might give you the sort of perspective that will help you to welcome additions to our culture.
Fifth, perhaps additions are exactly what they are. The addition of new doesn’t always require the removal of old, even if the frequency changes. Once again, going to the Lord may help you to see how the Lord would have you change.
Finally, changes to something you love “as-is” are hard. Yet the gospel of Jesus Christ is all about change. As the Lord’s coming draws closer, we will all have to change faster than ever before, and sadly, wickedness will increase at an accelerating pace as well. Perhaps changes in music and policy are to help us learn to better adapt to change. Didn’t the Come, Follow Me program and “2-hour Sunday meetings” changes help us adapt to the impact of COVID-19? Trust that the Lord knows what He’s doing. Trust that these changes are for good reason. Go to Him in prayer, testify of your trust, and ask Him what He would have you do to help you make the most of these changes. Then get up and do whatever He instructs – whether it’s to shore up your firm foundation, or to let your light shine, or whatever else.
I trust that the Lord is in charge. I testify that He and His gospel are what matters, and that learning to be guided by the Holy Ghost is essential. Focus your efforts here, Erica! Stay true, and the Lord will see you through whatever changes may come.
Gramps
