Question
Dear Gramps,
I am a YSA. A friend has been struggling with feelings from being single, anger with God, and seeming like promises are falling flat. She asked for a blessing though I’ve been struggling with the same things. I could tell the blessing didn’t come from me. But it seems to keep happening to me. Another friend just asked for a blessing and again I am struggling with similar things. What do I do/take from this/feel good enough to give blessings in those circumstances?
Nathan
Answer
Dear Nathan,
it is like music to my ears when I hear (or read) that our younger generation is in-tuned with the spirit and worthy to perform priesthood ordinances in the service of other’s needs.
There is a lot to learn and grow from and being single in a YSA ward; it could be a daunting experience.
In today’s society, there are many pressures that young single adults (YSA) face and more so within the Church.
I remember being young and always hearing people telling me, “when are you going to go on your mission?”, “Have you put your mission papers in yet?”, then, once I returned with honors, the next set of questions started… “When are you going to start dating?”, “better find someone soon?”, “you know what the prophets have said about returned missionaries…”
I completely understand the pressures our YSA face.
So, let’s address three issues I can see you touched on:
- your friends’ struggles/feelings with how they communicate with God and how He responds.
- your own struggles/feelings with the way you communicate with Heavenly Father and how He responds to you.
- should you still give blessing even though you’re struggling with the same issues?
In Mosiah 18:8-9 we read:
8 And it came to pass that he said unto them: Behold, here are the waters of Mormon (for thus were they called) and now, as ye are desirous to come into the fold of God, and to be called his people, and are willing to bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light;
9 Yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places that ye may be in, even until death, that ye may be redeemed of God, and be numbered with those of the first resurrection, that ye may have eternal life—
It is wonderful to be the type on man, anyone can count on for a blessing and through this service, we certainly “mourn” with those who are mourning life’s struggles, both great and small.
Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin said:
The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude. (emphasis added) Come What May and Love It
Feeling frustrated and desirous to have an immediate answer is normal and to be expected. So much so that Heavenly Father knows it and is keenly aware of that, thus, making sure that His timing is going to help us learn patience and obedience. We never know when the answer is going to come, but, we do know that it will come.
As far as how you feel about your own struggles, let me tell you this:
In Doctrine and Covenants 122:1-9 we read:
1 The ends of the earth shall inquire after thy name, and fools shall have thee in derision, and hell shall rage against thee;
2 While the pure in heart, and the wise, and the noble, and the virtuous, shall seek counsel, and authority, and blessings constantly from under thy hand.
3 And thy people shall never be turned against thee by the testimony of traitors.
4 And although their influence shall cast thee into trouble, and into bars and walls, thou shalt be had in honor; and but for a small moment and thy voice shall be more terrible in the midst of thine enemies than the fierce lion, because of thy righteousness; and thy God shall stand by thee forever and ever.
5 If thou art called to pass through tribulation; if thou art in perils among false brethren; if thou art in perils among robbers; if thou art in perils by land or by sea;
6 If thou art accused with all manner of false accusations; if thine enemies fall upon thee; if they tear thee from the society of thy father and mother and brethren and sisters; and if with a drawn sword thine enemies tear thee from the bosom of thy wife, and of thine offspring, and thine elder son, although but six years of age, shall cling to thy garments, and shall say, My father, my father, why can’t you stay with us? O, my father, what are the men going to do with you? and if then he shall be thrust from thee by the sword, and thou be dragged to prison, and thine enemies prowl around thee like wolves for the blood of the lamb;
7 And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit, or into the hands of murderers, and the sentence of death passed upon thee; if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine to hedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good.
8 The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he?
9 Therefore, hold on thy way, and the priesthood shall remain with thee; for their bounds are set, they cannot pass. Thy days are known, and thy years shall not be numbered less; therefore, fear not what man can do, for God shall be with you forever and ever.
So, this scripture reference is quite heavy and may seem unrelated to your question, and I shared it with a purpose: the world is crumbling as we know it. There are many who are panicking and full of anger. Decisions are being made for new governments, people are protesting for injustices. Riots are ensuing. Mother Nature is kicking our butt, and it all seems so gloom and doom.
All of these has been prophesied and predicted by God’s own servants through all generations of time, stating with Adam.
It may seem that nothing we do is going to change any of these and it could be so easy to get sucked in by the rhetoric of the media and people around us.
Nathan, my son, I t’s ok to feel inadequate, I do feel like that sometimes, but, you are doing well. Do not allow these influences affect the way you continue honoring your priesthood. “Hold on thy way and the priesthood shall remain with thee“. (emphasis is mine)
With love,
Gramps
