Question
Gramps,
Hi, for the past year, I have had many instances of very uncommon personal revelation for my age (16). I suffered terrible depression, so much so that I became suicidal. I believe this was Satan trying to destroy me from hearing God’s message. Now I know this is very, very rare, but hear me out: Through out my depression, I received multiple very clear revelations defining my life. I have been told what career path I need to take, and I even who am specificaly supposed to marry, is this normal?
Austin
Answer
Dear Austin,
I’m very sorry to hear about your depression and suicidal ideation. I would caution you not to write it off as Satan’s influence. Elder Holland recently gave a talk about depression called, A Broken Vessel. It’s a wonderful talk, and I recommend you read the whole thing. For now, I would like to highlight two portions of his advice to those who struggle with depression.
First, he said,
“Seek the counsel of those who hold keys for your spiritual well-being. Ask for and cherish priesthood blessings.”
You asked me about your personal revelation, but I can’t give you an answer about that except to say talk it over with your Bishop and get a blessing. I think that is the best way to find the answers you seek.
Second, Elder Holland counseled:
“If things continue to be debilitating, seek the advice of reputable people with certified training, professional skills, and good values. Be honest with them about your history and your struggles. Prayerfully and responsibly consider the counsel they give and the solutions they prescribe. If you had appendicitis, God would expect you to seek a priesthood blessing and get the best medical care available. So too with emotional disorders. Our Father in Heaven expects us to use all of the marvelous gifts He has provided in this glorious dispensation.”
Talk to your Bishop about seeing a therapist. A therapist would be another great resource to help you sort out all you are dealing with.
I’ll close with one more quote by Elder Holland :
“Believe in miracles. I have seen so many of them come when every other indication would say that hope was lost. Hope is never lost. If those miracles do not come soon or fully or seemingly at all, remember the Savior’s own anguished example: if the bitter cup does not pass, drink it and be strong, trusting in happier days ahead.”
I pray those happier days come quickly for you,
Gramps