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I have been wondering if I should go to college or serve a mission. My leaders have said it will be the best year and a half of my life. But I have bad anxiety being far away from home without someone I have known or a call home. I can’t even go to girl’s camp. I will get such bad anxiety I develop nausea. If I can’t survive 5 days, how can I survive 18 months? In college, I would be able to call home everyday. So I think college would be the best option. Could you help me?




Dear Lillian,

While all worthy, able young men are expected to fullfill a mission, it is not required of sisters.  So, whether or not you should serve a mission is ultimately a decision that you should make with the Lord.  However, the Lord does expect us to study it out in our minds, before we ask.  I can see that you have been carefully pondering this issue.

If it were the Lord’s will that you serve a mission, He could help you with these issues; however, it might not be his will for you to serve in this way.  Did you know that Steve Young (a retired NFL quarterback) didn’t serve a mission for the same reasons that you mention here?  He had severe social anxiety.  Working with his father, his Bishop and the Lord, he was guided to take a different path than the one that is customary for LDS young men.

We have been directed in the D&C to study it out in our minds, make a decision, and then approach the Lord with that decision and ask Him if it is right.  I suggest you prayerfully ask the Lord if college is the best path for you.  There is a Jewish proverb,

“If you want to hear God laugh, just tell Him your plans.”

I share that simply to say that the Lord has a plan for you.  As you continue to prayerfully seek Him, He will guide you and wonderful things will unfold.





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