Question
Gramps,
My husband is a high priest. He has been reading the Joseph Smith Papers and has watched many YouTube videos on many LDS subjects. He has expressed many things he has learned. One in particular he feels the Church didn’t disclose information pertaining to Joseph Smith in regards to him sending men members away on missions and then having their wives sealed to him. He hasn’t attended Church in 3 months and recently stopped wearing his top garment. Any suggestions on how to deal with this?
Kathy
Answer
Dear Kathy,
First off and most importantly, I want you to know that you, your family, and your husband are in our prayers here at Ask Gramps. Few things are more stressful and worrisome than watching a loved one go through a crisis of faith. For some of us, faith is very easy to have-and for others, we struggle and wrestle with many aspects of our religion. It’s very rare to meet someone who has never asked questions or doubted certain aspects of their faith. And that’s okay.
Perhaps most surprising to hear is that your husband is not alone. In a beautiful and touching letter, the apostle Hugh B Brown said to a doubting woman,
“Would you be surprised if I should tell you that I, too, have periods of perplexity, uncertainty and doubt?”
Let’s think about that for a minute. An apostle of Jesus Christ, a brilliant mind, and a leader of our church has admitted to having moments of doubt and questioning. I’m not sure about you, but I find that quote incredibly inspiring. If someone like him can go through the same struggles your husband has, there is truly hope for all of us.
The one thing your husband needs right now is your love and support. Experts in relationships tell us that communication is key, and if your husband no longer feels he can communicate with you-even when the communication might be uncomfortable or worrisome-your relationship will suffer drastically. None of us can see the future, and it’s important to remember that many of us have gone through struggles in our faith and come out fine in the end, and sometimes even stronger. Right now, the best thing for your family is for you to continue to pray-for yourself, your family, and your husband.
You are in our prayers.
Gramps
