Question
Gramps,
Many church members, including myself, have experienced the painful stigma associated with members who go through such an ordeal. Gossip, backbiting and judging are what divorcees often experience. I’ve always wondered why a church filled with members with high standards and principles would have such a hard time understanding the Christlike attributes of compassion, kindness and forgiveness when it comes to matters of divorce. I believe most LDS are very good people but this seems to be a big problem. I’d love to get your point of view.
SC
Answer
SC,
Pride is an odd disease. Its symptoms appear in everyone except the carrier.
My point of view on people with such character is that I sorrow that they can’t find anything else to fill their time than the personal matters of other people. There are so many options from reading books, to enjoying the beauty of nature and the world God gave us. They could spend time pondering the scriptures and seeking answers to questions they have of the Gospel. They could even donate some time to their community and brighten up someone else’s day. This last option is one I thoroughly enjoy doing as I don’t see near enough joy and happiness around me.
Sadly, the fact is there are people that have a very high interest in the private matters of other people, and I can’t see what the attraction would be. The only reasons I can see being interested in such things would be if I were prideful and sought to place myself above others. I could see myself acting this way if someone had offended me and I had yet to forgive them. Truthfully there are a number of possible reasons, though I must emphasise that none of them are good reasons because there aren’t any.
There is a danger that I must also point out here. In recognizing people that are given to gossip and backbiting, we ourselves are at risk of pride. In all things we must remain humble, meek, submissive, and strive for the presence of the Holy Ghost. In so doing we can find peace even in the midst of great adversity such as divorce or any other trials we must endure in this life.
Gramps
