Question
Gramps,
I don’t know what to do and I don’t want to be judgmental but I do want to help my family. I’m worried about my dad and the influence he’s brought to me and this family. When I was around 16, he introduced me to pornography, masturbation, and has also been involved in inappropriate touching. Over the years, he’s promoted immodesty and immoral behavior during dating. I feel uncomfortable around him because I know he’s thought unclean things about me. He’s been a member of the church his whole life, but he seems unhappy. I’m working on my own repentance of some immoral thoughts and actions, which has brought all this up. I love my dad, but I think he’s done some terrible things. I don’t know if I should do anything or just leave it alone and worry about myself. Please help me Gramps.
RachelÂ
Answer
Rachel,
What you describe sounds like sexual abuse of children. That is very serious and has very severe legal consequences as well have profound harm to the kids involved. You need to (1) report the matter to the local police so they can run an investigation on your dad and try to figure out how bad it is. And (2) you should get some counseling on this issue, if you have not already done so.
Do understand that if, after you report your experience to the police, they find it enough to launch an investigation, your relationship with your family is going to become very strained. It is human nature to take sides in matter like this. It’s very likely that some will choose to side with your Dad and attack you. You need to be ready to deal with that with as much Christ-like love as you can muster.
You love your Dad, but if he is guilty of the things you think he is then that love should compel you to stop him. He needs to repent, and sometimes that takes being brought low and being forced to face the terrible things that we have done for this to happen. Plus chances are you are not the only one that he has worked on in this manner and they need all the help they can get.
I wish you the best in this.
Gramps
