I am incredibly interested in deep doctrine. Things like Kolob, Theology, and other things intrigue my mind. I have been told by several church leaders that it is not good to think about things like that. I know I can’t ever really understand some subjects of the gospel but why can’t I think about things like that? Is it unhealthy for my mind?
Everyone has a limited amount of time, and we must all make choices as to how we use that time. The Church encourages us to spend time reading the scriptures and praying. One of the reasons the Church asks us to do this is because we need to be constantly nourishing the seed of faith we have planted in our hearts (see Alma 32:37). This takes time along with all the other stuff we need/choose to do during the day. So when someone asks, “Should I think and ponder about deep doctrine?”, I have to ask, “In place of what?”
If you choose to do your pondering instead of watching the latest inane reality TV show, then I would say you have chosen well. However in most of the cases, people mean to use this pondering in the place of their regular prayers and scripture study. This, in time, causes the seed of faith to wither from neglect, because it is no longer being tended to, and causes many problems for the individual in question. In the end, it means they have chosen poorly going down this path. This is generally the state that the Church leaders will see of someone who has chosen to study deep doctrine. Thus they are understandably concerned.
Assuming one can maintain his faith in addition to pondering the unknowns, there is one more potential issue. The correct answer to deeper doctrine simply has not been made known unto us, but it is human nature to become invested in things or ideas we spend a lot of time working on or pondering. Thus it is very likely that if you ponder things like Kolob, you are going to form your own ideas and opinions on what it ‘must’ be. But since we don’t know, we probably will encounter things that run contrary to what we think it ‘must’ be. It is a very hard thing to think or feel that we have wasted a lot of time and effort only to be wrong. Thus many people would fight an idea that does not match with what they expect. This could lead to the rejection of truth. So no matter how much time or effort a person put into studying the deep doctrines, they need to be ready to totally reverse course, if further light and knowledge show they have gone the wrong way.