Why should I be my brother’s keeper?

Question

Gramps,

Why should we care how others live their lives? 

Nathan

Answer

When Jesus was asked to identify the greatest law, He responded candidly: “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. … And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself” (see Matthew 22:37-39). Notably, He attached equal significance to loving others as to loving God, emphasizing that “on these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.”

Within the teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, this commandment is inseparable from the first. To love God is to love His children—all of them—without discrimination or exclusion. Love is a powerful motivator to perform good works. The Book of Mormon instructs us that if we have ‘faith, hope, and charity… [we] will always abound in good works.’” Charity, as described by the Apostle Paul and echoed in the Book of Mormon, is not easily provoked, thinks no evil, and endures all things.

Central to this doctrine is the understanding that charity—the pure love of Christ—makes loving one’s neighbor not just an obligation but an opportunity to transform both self and society. As Joseph Smith taught,

“Nothing is so much calculated to lead people to forsake sin as to take them by the hand, and watch over them with tenderness. When persons manifest the least kindness and love to me, O what power it has over my mind….”

The Church teaches that everyone is a literal child of Heavenly Father, and that showing genuine compassion brings us closer to Him and to each other.

One might assume it’s easy to love everyone when surrounded by like-minded individuals. Yet the world is teeming with diversity—different cultures, beliefs, political opinions, and life experiences. Even within a single congregation, complete uniformity of thought or personality is a myth.

Having the ability to compare and contrast ideas is a great blessing, enriching discussions and deepening friendships. But when differences turn into divisions—when other viewpoints are viewed as threats—kindness is often the first casualty. Social media, especially, creates what has been called an “echo chamber,” reinforcing our own views and making it even more difficult to truly listen or empathize with others.

How often do we justify not helping a neighbor? When we pass by someone in need—at a street corner or in our own community—it’s easy to rationalize inaction by blaming their circumstances or doubting their intentions. “Their own poor decisions are what got them there … so they aren’t my responsibility.” Yet, as Church leaders and scripture repeatedly point out, none of these justifications are valid. … We must do all we can do. … All we can see is what is right in front of us, and that should be motivation enough to help.

The Savior’s example in the parable of the Good Samaritan reminds us that love is not passive—it is proactive, crossing boundaries of comfort, prejudice, and even personal risk. True discipleship requires personal effort and an awareness that the responsibility to care for the poor and needy is not just collective but also individual.

Many find that real acts of love—delivering a meal, opening up to an outsider, or forgiving a hurt—can invoke anxiety, fear of rejection, or discomfort with difference. We do not grow if we remain in our comfort zones. Charity is a wonderful way to become more Christlike and to love people who are different than you.

Perhaps the highest test of loving our neighbor is the call to serve those we dislike or misunderstand. Words attributed to Abraham Lincoln, “I don’t like that man. I must get to know him better,” members are encouraged to reach out actively. Any act of service opens our hearts to those we serve. After all, we will truly be serving our Lord.

Notably, acts of service not only bring blessings to recipients but also healing, happiness, and spiritual refinement to the giver. President Dieter F. Uchtdorf taught,

“As we extend our hands and hearts toward others in Christlike love, something wonderful happens to us. Our own spirits become healed, more refined, and stronger. We become happier, more peaceful, and more receptive to the whisperings of the Holy Spirit.”

True inclusion—where we genuinely invite those different from us into our lives, not just our communities—requires effort, humility, and seeing others as God sees them. The early Christian Saints in Jerusalem and later the Nephites in the Americas experienced remarkable unity when “they had all things common among them … there were not rich and poor … but they were all made free, and partakers of the heavenly gift” (see Acts 2:44-47; 4 Nephi 1:2-3). Such unity, the Church teaches, does not demand sameness but celebrates the divine worth and agency of every child of God.

President Russell M. Nelson, addressing social and political divisions, urged:

“Simply stated, we strive to build bridges of cooperation rather than walls of segregation … We are all connected, and we have a God-given responsibility to help make life better for those around us. We don’t have to be alike or look alike to have love for each other. We don’t even have to agree with each other to love each other.”

Central to loving one’s neighbor is alleviating suffering and inequality. Scripture plainly states, “it is not given that one man should possess that which is above another, wherefore the world lieth in sin” (Doctrine & Covenants 49:20). If each of us had as much concern for others as we have for ourselves, essentially all of our social problems would be solved. Selfishness and self-interest lie at the root of many of our social ills.

The Church’s welfare program and humanitarian relief, inspired by biblical teachings (see Matthew 25:35-36), show that one of the main factors in that final judgment will be how willing we were to help others during this life. Helping others is expected not out of compulsion, but as an act of the heart. As President Marion G. Romney noted, “The efficacy of our prayers depends upon our liberality to the poor.”

Many resources encourage beginning with what you have and where you are—whether delivering a meal, making a donation, or simply offering a listening ear. Whatever and however you choose to give, start giving. Right now. … The Lord commanded us to care for the poor and needy, not just collectively but individually. This is your charge and obligation.

If fear or social anxiety is holding you back, try stepping outside your comfort zone with a simple act. Even small acts ripple outward in ways we cannot predict or control.

If you struggle to love those very different from you, one useful principle is to understand men and women as they are, and not understand them as you are. As Brother Brigham Young counseled,

“Your hearts should be filled with kindness—with brotherly, angelic feeling—to overlook their faults as far as possible. … It is for God to judge, condemn, punish, reward … but not for men. He will forgive whom he will forgive, but of us he required to forgive all men.” 

Practice listening with humility and patience, even to those you disagree with. Whether in person or online, aim to build bridges, not walls. Cooperation and goodwill are the foundations of peace and progress.

Gramps