I have some questions concerning faith in Christ and I’d appreciate any insights. I have a terminal, time sensitive disease that without His intervention, will result in death in the near future. I greatly desire physical healing. I have no idea how such healing would happen, as irreparable damage has been done, only I know He could if it is His will and if I have faith in Christ. I am currently in the process of turning my life around and repenting of those things I need to. Can I depend on assurance from Heavenly Father that as I turn back towards Him, He will let me know of His will and whether or not He will grant me the healing I seek? Do you know of any talks or books that can assist me in developing Faith in Christ? Will He answer me, even in my current imperfect state, if I come to Him in humility with a plan of action, ask for His help, and let me know if He will grant me the healing I seek if I but do my part?
I must admit, you have asked a very difficult question regarding the willingness for God to heal a person to live longer. However, let me say this before I begin to address the questions, the Lord is pleased that you have desired to return to him.
Within scripture we have evidence of the Lord healing nearly any illness or disease. We know that God has power to do all things according to his will and pleasure.
When developing faith in Christ we are actually first seeking his will, and not our own. This can be very difficult especially when it may mean our death, or something very important that we feel we deserve and have not received.
Elder Maxwell once shared three simple words, “But, if not” in connection with a Bible experience:
“We have been given three special words—but if not—by three submissive young men who entered their fiery furnace, knowing “our God … is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, … But if not, be it known unto thee, O king, that we will not serve thy gods.” (Dan. 3:17–18).
I would recommend two books by Elder David A Bednar: “Increase in Learning” and “Act in Doctrine”. These are great books to increase your faith in Christ.
As pertaining to talks regarding increasing our faith, I would begin with Robert D. Hales talk, “Finding Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.”
As pertaining to your question about making a contract with God? Is it possible, yes. Is it the Lord’s will? I do not know. That is a decision you will need to discover through personal effort and prayer with the Lord personally and individually.
I truly wish I could be of more help.