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Dear Gramps,

My patriarchal blessing promises me (depending upon my faithfulness and obedience of course) that my children will be sealed to me while I sojourn on this earth. I am 59 years old and a single parent. My children are grown and have testimonies, but both are inactive.

I have never had a desire to date since my divorce in 1984. I am not interested in getting married again. I asked my stake president if I was supposed to look for a husband (to fulfill my blessing and have my children sealed to me… as they cannot be unless I am married in this life). He said “no mam! He is supposed to be looking for you!”

I am willing to be obedient in this life but I prefer that the Lord assign me a husband. I sure didn’t make a good choice. I am a convert and married before joining the church. How can my blessing possibly be fulfilled?

All of the other blessings are being fulfilled. I was told that in my later life I would have an

opportunity to work as an officiator in the temple of the lord…even those that were not yet built. Well, there was a temple built just an hour and a half from me. And I have been called to work in it, and am in training now…and loving it.

What are your thoughts on my question? I do not fret. And I do trust the Lord on this. But I would like to know how you feel a way will be provided. I know one will. My heavenly father has promised me. But what if I die before my children become active? Thank you,

Frances, from North Carolina

Dear Frances,

I answered your question on 7/14, but apparently sent it to the wrong address, as listed above. So, here is the response that I sent to you at that time——

You have already addressed one of the keys to your dilemma. You mentioned that having your children sealed to you depended upon your faithfulness. I would imagine that it also depends upon their faithfulness. Without a doubt all the blessings promised by the Lord our conditioned upon our willingness to receive those blessings. Free agency in never abrogated.

That being said, the Lord has marvelous ways of helping his children qualify for his blessings. One of the prerequisites for that qualification is the application of the principle of faith. You must have confidence that your children will repent and become active in the kingdom. They may not, but it they don’t it won’t be because of your lack of faith, but because of their continued disobedience.

You may or may not be united in mortality with a worthy husband, but having received your endowments, if you live worthily, absolutely none of the promised blessings with be denied you. Much goes on beyond the grave in our continued preparation for the blessings promised by the Lord in his holy house.

My suggestion is that you continue to live according to gospel principles, that you leave in the hands of the Lord those things that are in the province of others, and that you be at peace, knowing that the will of the Lord will ultimately be carried out, and that your blessings will be assured in the Lord’s own time and in his own way.

Just last week I sealed a 92-year-old woman to her deceased husband, and their deceased son to them. There is always hope.


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